Young people are passionate about music and parents are, understandably, worried about what’s appropriate for young ears. Today, however, parents need to look beyond lyrics to think about how kids are getting their music. Downloaded music is so readily available that teens can easily slip into behavior that is both unethical and illegal.

The issue of music piracy is serious enough to have inspired the Stop Online Piracy Act, a law that was supposed to update rules about copyright and fair use. Congress failed to pass the bill so it continues to be up to parents to keep kids on the right side of laws that were admittedly designed for simpler times. The basic rule is that artists are entitled to compensation for what they do. This is confusing territory because some musicians — especially those who don’t have lucrative record contracts — are perfectly willing to give their music away. And many websites lure kids in with claims that the music they provide is free and legal.

Unfortunately, most of the websites that claim to offer "free" music are actually peer to peer (P2P) file sharing sites. Downloading the software on these sites allows your child to rifle through what’s on the computers of others — and vice versa. This isn’t necessarily illegal because some of what people share through these sites is in the public domain. Much of the material, however, is copyrighted so it’s being distributed without authorization from the people who own it.

Downloading music without permission from the artist is a form of theft, pure and simple. Point out to your kids that they show respect for the artists who create the music they love when they download files in a way that works for those artists. Perhaps the best analogy is a supermarket where it’s perfectly OK to take the free taste of lasagna or the sample cookie being offered by the bakery because the store decides to makes these freebies available. It’s not OK to eat a package of cookies before you get to the checkout and it’s certainly not OK to steal those cookies even if you intend to share them with your friends.

Parents need to help kids understand that music is free only when the artist decides it should be free. Otherwise, people need to pay for the privilege of listening to what other people worked hard to create. With that in mind, parents can guide kids to legitimate sources for their favorite tunes. Here’s a list of alternatives from least to most expensive:

Public library. Some libraries subscribe to Freegal, a service that allows patrons to download music legally. The program is controversial because it violates the traditional idea of a library as a place that where people borrow materials and then return them. Still, if your local library offers the service, get your kid a card.

Direct from artists. Many musicians are perfectly willing to distribute music for free because they figure that, if they can build a fan base, they will earn money from sales of tickets and merchandise. This is especially true for independent artists though sometimes even the big names release free tracks to their fans. The best way to be sure the artist has authorized distribution of the music is to go directly to his or her website or blog.

Streaming. Some websites function like radio stations by streaming music from their files to your speakers. Lastfm.com, Pandora.com and Spotify.com make it possible to legally listen to thousands of songs without actually downloading them. Like radio stations, the free versions of these websites play commercials. For a few dollars a month, you can give your child access to nothing but music.

Subscription. At subscription sites, a monthly fee allows your child to listen to anything on the website. The music can’t be burned to a CD but it can be downloaded to an MP3 player. Once a month, the player must be synched to the website and, if you end your subscription, the music goes away. Some subscription services like Napster also offer a fixed number of downloads per month. This can be an ideal solution for teens because they can listen to as many songs as they like but they have to be choosy about what they actually download.

Pay-Per-Song. Sites like iTunes or Amazon sell licenses for music that becomes a permanent part of your child’s personal collection. The price per song varies depending upon two factors. First, you pay a little more for higher quality which is measured in kbps — a higher number means better fidelity. Second, cost increases as you buy more rights. Digital rights management (DRM) determines the number of times a song can be copied, and you pay more for unlimited copies.

Peer to Peer. Most adolescents aren’t savvy — or patient — enough to figure out how to use P2P sites legally and safely. These sites evade the law by claiming that they don’t distribute anything. They do, however, make it possible for people to share unlimited copies of files that don’t belong to them so they put those who use them in legal jeopardy. P2P sites are also notorious for passing on viruses and other malware. By some estimates, more than 20% of the downloaded files include nasty code that will at the very least mess up your system and, at the worse, may give others access to information that shouldn’t be shared. For all these reasons, P2P sites are much more expensive than they seem, and they should be off limits for teens.

Getting music legally online is much easier than it used to be. As Music United points out, there are now 400 legal music sites compared to 50 in 2003. (A helpful list of some of those sites is available at www.musicunited.org/6_legalsites.aspx) Talk about which online format best matches your child’s tastes and budget. If possible, provide a music allowance or help your child figure out how to earn the money needed to purchase music legally. Teaching your child to do the right thing will take more effort and money but it’s every bit as important as keeping track of which songs include X-rated lyrics. RPM

Carolyn Jabs, M.A., is the mother of three computer-savvy kids. She has been writing about families, technology and ethics for more than 20 years. Other Growing Up Online columns appear on her website www.growing-up-online.com.